The other thing I used to do was interrupt them so I could tell them one of my stories and they would know that I understand. That's another thing I disliked that people did to me when I was suffering. I wanted them to listen to me, let me cry, hug me then listen more. I didn't realize what I was doing to people until I went through a period of self-examination and even asked friends to be candid with me about some of my behavior. I read a book entitled, Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World (info on right side-bar under Book Suggestions) and that book really spoke to me about having a teachable heart. I learned that if I began to listen without being offended, then I could take that corrective criticism to the Lord and ask the Holy Spirit to examine my heart and help me correct it. It's NOT any one's job to fix someone else, but if someone asks for wisdom, give it through love and then pray for the person to be healed by the Holy Spirit. I repeat, our job is not to fix anyone! Our job as Christian brothers or sisters is to simply bring a person who asks for help, into the presence of the Lord, first through prayer, then wise counsel through love.
I remember years ago asking God to build the character of gentleness in me. He didn't throw a big text book down from heaven at me and expect me to pass a test regarding theory and application by the following Monday. No, He heard my prayer and from that moment on, His Holy Spirit became my highlighter in life! As opportunities arose I was taught and led by God until the fruit of gentleness began to grow in my character. It's the same with patience, each inconvenience and struggle became an opportunity for me to exercise my muscle of patience. If I dropped something and it rolled to a difficult place to reach, the old me would have had a conniption! Now, (more often than not), I sing this little song I wrote as I struggle to retrieve it..."Patience is a virtue that I long to have..." and I just do what I have to do and I don't freak out about every little thing. I used to be my own worst enemy and my spiritual immaturity not only hurt me but it hurt those who had to be around me. My impatience and temper was scary to be around and it was selfish of me to impose my frantic mood on others. I've had to ask many people to forgive me, but that also gave me an opportunity to share with them what God has done in my life!
It's not so funny how we act so pleasant around neighbors, pastors, priests, friends...but we exercise little or no self-control around the ones we love the most. I think its true that we hurt the ones we love, and I think we do it because we know that they will love us anyway. Isn't that more reason to be kind to them. Jesus said, Whatever you do unto the least of my brethren, you have done it unto me." Matthew 25:40. I think that goes for acts of selfishness or cruelty as well as acts of love. We should all work at seeing the Jesus in everyone, using a spiritual etiquette that is worthy of the high calling of being children of the King. We should also practice doing unto others as we would have them do unto us! If we pray for a teachable heart, God will build it up in us, and the lessons of love will make us more Christ-like. Don't wait for others to change, change yourself first and you'll begin to see them respond. Who wants to be near a porcupine?
Galatians chapter 5, verses 22,23a, is where we are told the Fruits of the Spirit.... Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. I remember doing a bible study one morning with my friend Kat and my son Brandon. We each took turns naming each fruit and giving an example from our life of how we either used it or didn't. I recall how each of us was so effected by that exercise, because it brought to the forefront of our minds the profound effect of our choices. The times we chose to show one of God's fruit, we felt good, yet when we chose to not use kindness, gentleness, self-control and so on, we felt bad. Take time to memorize all the fruits, make little note cards and put them on the bathroom mirror and on your dashboard in the car. Teach them to your children so they can begin to know the character of God and what he wants them to be like. When our grand-children stayed with us, I put cards with all the names of the fruits on them up on the wall. Every time there was an issue, I would take them to the wall and ask them if that behavior was a fruit of God. It was a wonderful teachable moment for all of us. Start looking at all the situations of your life and how you could use certain fruits in them.These fruits build spiritual etiquette, and people will want to know what's different about you. That's when you can share with them about the goodness of God :)
Things do not change, we change. Henry David Thoreau
No comments:
Post a Comment