Loss and Found

My son and his wife called me this morning to see how his grandmother was doing. She is 86 and not doing well as she went into the hospital last night. She is the sole care-giver to my husbands brother who is 54 years old and disabled (like Rain-man). He will be a permanent part of our lives when she passes. My son commented that he was amazed at how Dad and I were handling such trauma for such a long period of time! Of course we talked about God (because my son, his wife and my grand-children all love the Lord :), and how God bestows such precious spiritual gifts as we go through dark times. I couldn't help but feel a tremendous joy in my heart as I was realizing how much I've changed because of God's love!

I heard a sermon the other day and the speaker said that God's work in our life is like a recipe. Just as each ingredient in a cake mix is not pleasant on its own, ie: flour, eggs, baking soda, oil.... Yet, together it is wonderful! So it goes for the separate circumstances in our life! Each experience may not be pleasant but when they are all put together in the end, that's your life and God has a purpose for you! In the book of Jeremiah 29:11-14a God says, "For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future! Then, you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me when you seek with all your heart. I will be found by you and I will bring you back from captivity." Romans 8:28 says that, "All things work together for good for those who love the Lord and are called according to His purpose!" Philippians 1:6  also states, "For He who has begun a good work in you will be faithful to complete it!" There are children who let their parents teach them and influence them and a life of good character follows. Let the God who created you, love you .

 I also found an old note I jotted down a couple years ago which read...God only gives us enough strength for today! If we choose to drag the regrets and bitterness of the past or the worries of the future into today then we must accept the fact that when we wear out, it's because we didn't obey God. Read Matthew 6:25-34. He knows what's best for us and he longs for us to take heed, just as we long for our own children to respect our wisdom. Most of our issues are self imposed, yet, God is the great recycler, using everything to His glory! He wants the wounds to heal but He needs the scars to be left because that's how He uses us to comfort and empathize with others who are in pain. I have learned to take my own advise and widen my view. I take the microscope off me and try to see my situation all happening in the palm of God's hand. I allow myself to ebb and flow in and out of the five grieving stages ie: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance, because every loss needs to be grieved! But when I see healing begin that's when I try to see how my life experiences can help others. As long as we are on this earth, darkness will accompany light, sorrow will sister with joy and turmoil and peace will be like oil and water, together yet separate. Until that day, when Christ returns, and all that is crooked will be made straight and there will be no more sorrow and no more tears!

As life carries us like a leaf on a creek, we will find the journey sometimes to be a breeze and even joyful yet other times it will take us threw tumultuous rapids with deep currents, turnarounds and flips.We don't know what the next moment will bring whether it be a trial or a joy, but I know "Who" is the Living Water upon which I float! In Matthew 4:35-41, when Jesus told the disciples to get in the boat and go to the other side, He didn't mean unless something prevents us! He said, "Let us go to the other side".Yet, when the great storm arose in the middle of the sea the disciples freaked out! They ran over to Jesus, who was sleeping peacefully and began screaming at him, "Don't you care if we die! Jesus stood up and rebuked the wind and the waves, "Quiet! Be still!" and the wind died down and it was completely calm. He said to them, "Why are you so afraid? Do you still lack faith?" They were terrified and asked each other, "Who is this man that even the winds and waves obey him!" Learning to trust the One who created the water and the wind gives us a peace beyond all understanding. Whatever boat you are in right now, Jesus is in it with you!

When God promises something He means it and we should take caution with each thought or action whether we are being driven by feelings and emotions or did we bother to see what God thought about it. I was given a great piece of wisdom by someone who told me, "Be sure you have the three steps in proper order. First, the truth from God's Holy Word, second, your mind believing, knowing and trusting His Word and third, your emotions knowing their proper place! How many times can you look back and recall events that sent you into an emotional tornado? We get turned around, slivers and dirt blur our vision, bumps, bruises, bangs, confusion, fear, disorientation! Can u see how you could handle some of these storms with a more level head if you didn't let your emotions control you? Pray for a peaceful mind. Even tragedies, when given time, can turn a grave into a flower bed.

I used to let my emotions run me! Every little hiccup in life sent me reeling. I am no longer like that because first of all, God loved me enough to get my attention and secondly, I surrendered to His love and grew in the grace and knowledge of Him and in doing so, fell in love with Him during that process. The old me had emotions first, and the rest was chaos. Now I read my bible while letting it renew my mind and tame my emotions. Along this path of life I have also learned to pack lightly and not to try to bring my regrets and worries with me. As the creek sweeps me along I relax more, succumbing to the flow as the leaf does. I've learned to be patient too, while my life is baking. I don't freak out over the broken and beaten eggs but I stay focused on the sweet smell that is going to come from the hot oven and the dessert that I will have in the end to share with Jesus and my other friends! I have had a lot of loss in my life, but because of God, I have found much, much more! Though my pockets are bare, I am a rich woman! Thank you Lord...for everything.