 |
| My nephew Shawn |
My counselor gave me an assignment to do once and it entailed writing down five year increments from birth to the present and recording my memories into each category. There was only one increment that didn't have something traumatic in it and as I looked at it, I realized that I was just a child when many of these things happened, then a teenager and then a young woman. The residue of those traumas went on and affected my adult life in so many aspects. So much loss, fear and pain for a little girl with no mom. I couldn't see God in my pain and I was very angry at him, but I also knew that he was real and I had a healthy fear of him, as should we all. I never admitted that I was mad at God though, I just kept it in a secret box inside my heart and there it stayed, seething.
Ever notice when we go to clean or do a project that the first thing we do is go put on some comfortable work clothes. I have a separate pile in the hallway closet with clothes that are so worn out and comfortable that when I put them on I'm ready to take on anything! We would never think to put on our dress-up clothes to do a dirty job! Well, God is no different than us because he took off his pure white robe and purple sash and put on an every day tunic to come and actually be with us, to help us get cleaned up and fixed! I always saw God as, out there somewhere, all holy and righteous and I was an untouchable stain. The way I feel when I'm all dressed up in a white sun dress at a BBQ picnic and the stain is something you don't want near you! But, through years of counseling, reading my bible, fellowship with other Christians and prayer, I've come to see God as the One who will get dirty, to come and save me! I'm not some "thing" that he avoids, I'm his child. Those days of blaming him are over and now I see him "in" everything I go through.
You know all those starving woman and children, all those people being tortured around the world.....God is with them. It's the evil, cruel and greedy that steal their humanitarian support whether it be food, water or money. Dictators and rulers suppress their own people, some hoard them into prisons or refugees camps and treat them like animals. Places like Dar fur, Somalia....hunt and kill the innocents! Syria and Lebanon use woman and children as human shields and bombs. Hitler posed as a godly man to gain power, the Taliban beat and stone women, and the list goes on! ALL of us will have to answer to God one day, those who have repented and are washed in the blood of Christ will have their sins covered and forgiven. But those who have abused their positions of power or those who have hurt even one of God's precious children will stand alone with only their unrepentant acts of cruelty to convict them. There will be a judgement day for those who chose to hurt rather than heal. God has appointed everyone their station, and everyone has a duty to love, those who choose otherwise will have to answer for that. Until God's rapture or return, we are the presence of God.
Inviting God into your "ugly" is refreshing, freeing, and liberating! He wants to be in it with you, not pushed aside. And, you know, all those times I told him to get away from me...he never left, he never leaves....we can turn our back on him but he will never turn his back on you, ever! He never gave up on me and my angry little heart! He excavated that box that I had buried in my heart and when I finally told him he could open it, his light of truth shined in and set me free from all the lies! God is in your pain, your confusion, your circumstance, and he loves you. Oh, how he loves you. James 4:8 says, "Draw near to God and he will draw near to you." If any one of us is angry at him, then we are the cause of the distance between us and the view of his fathomless love! It is obstructed by our own anger or stubbornness! When we start to draw near to God by reading his word or going to church....that's when you will start to see with new eyes.... his work through his children. If something is bad or sad, it's not from God it's from sin! God is in it with his children, like a buddy in a fox hole.
Those times when my doubts turn my heart depressed, and all I feel is completely overwhelmed with self-pity, those are the times when my attitude debilitates me from helping others, because I'm so focused on me! That's exactly what satan wants is ineffective, useless, frightened people! Because when God's children are not out there visibly doing his acts of love, that's when people don't see God! I know right now, not having a car is what's making me feel so ineffective and useless! But, I have to see God in it, and know that this is where he wants me right now,.writing these deep truths that he has given to me and sharing them through this blog. I'd rather be out there busy but he wants me "still" right now so he can talk through me. My friend Jill just lost her dear friend and sister-in-law, and her brother had a severe heart attack just minutes after learning of his wife's death! What did Jill do? She went to him, she loved him and served him, she comforted him and listened to his cries of pain. Where was God? He was there, in Jill!
How can we go from a person who questions God, to a person who lets God live through them? We love. We love others as their lives are crumbling, we comfort, care, serve and pray for them. God is here "IN US"! He lives and loves through us and we can't let our anger which is rooted in lies stop us from being his hands, voice, eyes and feet! HE IS IN IT, THROUGH US! It's only when we see life without God's love being expressed that we cry out, WHY? Do, do, do, unto others as you would have them do unto you! Whatever your gift is, go, go, go and exercise it in the lives of the hurting. My sister just called and told me that her son Shawn may have colon cancer! He's my nephew that I've spoken of in the past that is severely handicapped. He was just diagnosed two weeks ago with a degenerative spine that is literally crushing him to death and now this! My sister's husband also needs a kidney in order to live! How does she cope? She made sure she had a supportive friend who prays with her, listens to her, cries with her and supports her. She prays to God for all she needs to endure and for the strength to be there and fulfill her duties to her family. Where is God? He is in my sister as she cares for them, he is in Shawn and his joyful spirit as he endures it all with a smile, which comforts my sister so much! He is in me as I'm there for her, he is in the doctor's as they share compassion and knowledge, he is in every kind person that her path crosses........God is in us.
Replace your fears and doubts with the love and confidence that God has for you. People need "you"! You are here for a specific purpose and that is to be a mirrored image of God in this world. No matter where you are or what your limitations are, God can use you! Some people love to cook, some clean, some run errands, some sit and listen, some encourage, some write, some dance, some ........ Be his work gloves and let him use you so that people will stop saying, "Where is God?" and start saying, "I see God in you!" God is not mean, he is not absent, he is not indifferent, people are. Why would God allow people to hurt you or your loved ones? He doesn't, the sin and evil that is in the hearts of men, and is not bridled by God's Spirit, follows it's own fleshly desires. People hurt people, God feels everything we feel, he rejoices when we rejoice and he weeps when we weep. He takes no pleasure in sickness, pain or anything evil! Sickness is a result of this sin ravaged world but it will not last forever. He is planning on retrieving us very soon, so go be God's image in the world and serve just as he served when he walked this earth.
They will know you as children of God by your love for one another.
1 John 4:16...And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is Love. Whoever lives in love, lives in God, and God in him!
1 John 4:19....We love because he first loved us!
1 John 4:4b....The One (God) who is "in you" is greater than the one (satan) who is in the world!
Galatians 5:13.... Serve one another in love.
2 Corinthians 5:14.... For Christ's love compels us...
Ephesians 4:1,2.... As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle, be patient, bearing with one another in love.
Hebrews 10:23,24.... Let us hold to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.
1 Peter 1:22b....Love one another deeply from the heart.
1 Peter 4:7,8....The end of all things is near. Therefore be clear minded and self-controlled so that you can pray. Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers a multitude of sins.
2 Peter 1:5,6,7....Make every effort to add to your faith goodness, and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. For, if you posses these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive....
LOVE IS A VERB
No comments:
Post a Comment