Knots

I've admitted that I'm not a multitasker and when too many things get on my plate I get overwhelmed easily. So often I am amazed at how others handle so many major issues at one time along with the multitude of small things happening in between. This morning as I was doing some sewing I was praying and asking God to guard my mind with His helmet of salvation in regards to some things that are coming up. As I was praying the spool of thread dropped and I ended up with a handful of string that was in knots. It didn't upset me too much because for some reason I love to unknot things! I think because it keeps me focused on one task and it clears my mind of other issues. It relaxes me and in that state of mindlessness I'm able to hear God in  ways I otherwise could not.

As I began to unknot the string the Lord spoke to me regarding how I need to let life unfold in His terms and not mine. I looked down and in my hands were so many knots and I had to just start at one end and one at a time along with patience and joy (I had Christian music on) take one knot out at a time. I couldn't focus on the knots ahead and I had to stay intent on the one knot that was on my attention. One knot at a time. As I worked on it the Lord kept revealing to me that that is exactly how He wants me to handle my upcoming issues. God works along with us to unravel the circumstances and trials of our lives. We are never alone, we never have to be all-knowing, we never have to get ahead of ourselves. The All-Mighty God of the universe who designed us before the foundations of the earth handles our knots. In His timing all things work together for good!

All God wants from us is trust and obedience. When we surrender to His timing and trust in His grace we are free from anxiety, worry and control. Relinquishing control to our unseen God is probably one of our hardest tasks and only reveals a seed of unbelief in our mind and heart. So many times we want to take the machete from Him, tell Him to get behind us and just start chopping our own path through the jungle before us. We often do that and it just leaves us exhausted and lost, laying there praying to Him to help us. Let's try a new way! Let's surrender to Him and trust Him to make a way before us that is best for us. One knot, one mess at a time.

Isaiah 25:1, O Lord, You are my God, I will praise You. I will give thanks to Your name. For You have been faithful to do great things, plans You made long ago.

Psalm 9:10, Those who know your name will put their trust in You. For You O Lord, have never left alone those who look for You.

Isaiah 46:11, "I have spoken, and I will make it happen. I have planned it, and I will do it, says the Lord."

Deut 7:9, "Know then that the Lord your God is God, the faithful God. He keeps His promise and shows His loving-kindness to those who love Him and keep His laws, even for a thousand generations."

Filled and Pouring Out

One of the bible studies I'm currently doing is on The Armor of God by Pricilla Shirer. The insight that God has given her has been blessing so many of us women. Yesterday she taught on the Shield of Faith and so many things became clear to me about how I handle being overwhelmed. She explained that in ancient times the warriors had wooden shields that they would raise above their head when the enemy was shooting flaming arrows at them. I always thought about it from the perspective of protecting themselves but never really expanded the reasoning of why the opponents set the arrows on fire. The reasoning was that the flaming arrows would set the wooden shields on fire thus making the warriors that were being attacked have to break their turtle shell formation rendering them vulnerable and distracted by having to put out the flames!

Pricilla went on to explain that that is exactly what satan's demons do to us daily and that the Shield of Faith that God calls us to take up will extinguish those fires instantly. The fires are not to kill us but they are intended to distract us, discombobulate us, overwhelm us and to get our focus off God and onto our problems! This hit me so profoundly and I could see clearly for the first time how satan's army did this to me repeatedly throughout my life! I spent most of my energy focused on all the situations and the feelings that they evoked rather than seeing this offensive strategy.

I have been applying the truths that I've been learning throughout this study along with the teachings of my other study which is on Joy. The empowerment and insight are like a covering of peace that I've never fully experienced before. I just want to encourage you to draw near to God (James 4:8) because He promises that if we do that He will draw near to us! You wouldn't bake without a recipe or try to fix something without tools so why would you try to live your life apart from the ONE who loves you most. He has the tools and the recipe for living a life filled with wisdom, discernment, joy, soundness of mind, ...

If I didn't join bible studies throughout the years then I would not have all this information that is changing my life from one of ineffectiveness to one of power. All through these studies God used me in my sister's life to help her get through some horrible times. If I wasn't armed with these learned truths then I would have been ineffective in that mission but God knew what I needed. I committed to drawing near to Him through study and He equipped me with knowledge and wisdom that not only changed me but encouraged and changed my sister! God wants to make your life remarkable! He wants it to be a life saturated and flowing over with His power, His love and the soundness of mind that only He can give (2 Timothy 1:7). It only takes a simply step of faith toward Him, then, abundance in Him can be yours and yours to share!

Ephesians 3:17-19, I pray that Christ may live in your hearts by faith. I pray that you will be filled with love. I pray that you will be able to understand how wide and how long and how deep His love is. I pray that you will know the love of Christ. His love goes beyond anything that we can understand. I pray that you will be filled with God himself.

Child of God, A brick of red hot coal soon goes out when it is removed from the source of fire. 

New Attitude

I have friends coming to visit from California and I'm really excited about seeing them. Yet, as I stand here in the middle of my house I have this feeling that I'm not on top of things but that things are on top of me. I have some sewing to do, projects, laundry, cleaning, and I have two Bible studies that I need to finish for the week. The old me would go crawl in bed and feel overwhelmed but because of all the growing I've done through God I can stand here now and simply ask the Lord to unfold my tasks while making my day joyous. Everything will work out and I will enjoy the journey. I love the new me that I have allowed God to make me! Instead of life overwhelming me I let God overwhelm me with his joy instead! My husband always says, "How do you eat an elephant?" And he makes me say back to him, "One bite at a time." So, I'm going to go put some Christian music on and enjoy my day!

2 Corinthians 5:17, Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!

A Poem

Happy Day by Dee Hartmann

Oh, to be young and wear a tulle skirt with sneakers. A flower wreath in my hair, without a care. Swinging, laughing, being honest with my body and heart! Living my part. To feel so deeply that weeping and rejoicing are friends along with my dear, true friends, my really friends. The burst of spring, shedding of fall, winters rest and summers call, all in my eyes as I twirl my tulle skirt with hands to the sky.

Ashamed?

If we try to walk in our own worthiness our shame smothers God's flame of freedom. Choices we've made, unbridled words, actions that caused pain to others are just some of the behaviors that have dropped seeds of shame in our minds and hearts. We suffer with grieving thoughts and heavy guilt from our past and it's as if we are living life with a load of bricks that we drag around behind us. Does God want us to live like that? Can our mind ever be free from the past? Yes, there is freedom and I can assure you that God DOES NOT want us to carry those burdens.

Proverbs 14:30 states, "A heart that has peace is life to the body, but a broken spirit dries up the bones." The condition of our heart determines the life we have in our physical state. How we talk to ourselves and to God sets the trjectory for our life. Beginning each day by acknowledging God's majesty in all things sets us up for joy no matter what our circumstances are. Confessing our sins and then confirming His forgiveness and love toward us sets a platform of freedom under our feet. Giving thanks and knowing that He is in control of everything brings us peace. Surrendering our needs and concerns to Him gives us hope! Joy, freedom, peace and hope are what our hearts need. Yet ever so often we choose to begin our days with regret, sorrow and anger. Who has the better way, God or us? It is in His worthiness not ours where we should hunger and thirst to be.

Proverbs 17:22, "A glad heart is good medicine!

Psalm 42:11, "Why are you sad, oh my soul? Why have you become troubled within me? Hope in God, for I will yet praise Him, my help and my God!"

Each day begins with a choice of either regret or joy, forgiveness or anger, depression or hope. You may have busied yourself to a point where you don't conciously think about it but there is a river that runs through your soul and hard times or times of illness will reveal its properties of either being bitter or fresh. Ask God to reveal you in His worthiness and not yours.

Safest Place

Whatever you are going through right now, good or bad, is happening right in the palm of God's hand! You are safe and loved.

Floodlight or Laser Pointer?

I awoke this morning from a dream that would not let me go. As I struggled with it and finally pulled my senses together I began to see how the dream was a reflection of fragments of my life right now. I was searching for someone that I loved but could not find them in the crowds. My anxiety and frustration mounted until I woke from it, yet, it kept trying to pull me back in.

As I layed there trying to process all of it I realized that I was looking at each issue with a laser pointer. Focused with an unconscious inner frenzy as to how to deal with each one. As I pondered and prayed, God began to unfold truths to my mind and I began to deal with the issues from a new perspective. In line with how God works in His wondrous ways, He had given me a visual experience earlier this week that He applied to my morning dilemma. When issues begin to surround us it is imperative not to give each one the mounting attention it does NOT deserve! God deserves our attention NOT "worrying".

Last week as My husband and I stood outside our home and looked at all the weeds that had consumed our property, we were overwhelmed! We are new to upstate NY and moved here from California a couple years ago. Things are done very differently here because of the four seasons, the amount of rain and the size of the properties. We went from a neighborhood to a seven acre home where 3/4ths of it needs to be maintained! Each year we've toiled to get this project manageable and we're getting closer but it is taking not only labor but a new mind-set to get on top of it.

As I was driving home last week I was talking to God and telling Him that we need a gardener/landscaper to help us. I asked Him to just let me see a crew working so I could pull over and get their information. It wasn't more that a minute after I said that and there was a crew and I pulled over. Two days later the owner showed up at our house to go over what needed to be done. Brian and I were expressing our feelings regarding weed encroachment and as we spoke you could see the frustration and anxiety rising in both of us. The landscaper began to talk and there was a peaceful, knowledgeable, quiet commanding way about him. He intelligently and systematically layed out a plan to get everything taken care of and told us what to do between his work days. He ended  by saying, "Everything will be okay and it will all work out." After he left, Brian and I just looked at each other and said the same thing, "Wow! That guy was awesome! He just made us feel so at peace!"

We continued our discussion on the porch and my husband and I were amazed how someone who has knowledge and experience can settle the hearts of the anxious. Then, instantly (being the kind of person I am) my mind began to see all the metaphors in the situation and how God has a floodlight view of our lives. He sees all, while we tend to focus like a laser on encroaching problems and injustices. We get overwhelmed and frightened, while God is sure, just and all knowing!

 The weeds in our yard are just one area in our life right now that feel out of control. There are some loved ones that are struggling and suffering with their own personal issues and our hearts are breaking for them. We are holding them up in intercessory prayer and on our knees fighting in Christ's name for their spiritual recovery. God gave us the weeds and the gardener to show us metaphorically how He is so intimately involved in our lives. We focus on the problems while God has a broad view of the solutions. If we look close enough, we can see Him in control and confident regarding our problems and needs.

The weeds represent the relational issues and problems in our lives. The gardener revealed God's character of wisdom, peace, trouble shooting skills, concern and love for His garden of souls. God speaks to us, "All will be well. I have a process. Rest in my promises." I could feel God telling me, just as the gardener did, to keep busy, pull weeds and work methodically while He does the heavy work of not just pulling weeds but making it so they can't take over again! (Weed cloth and thick mulch).

My dear friends, this is a sinful and tainted world where we must realize that there are vermin, pests and weeds that are relentless but we have a Master Gardener who they can not hide from. His Floodlight exposes them and He uses them to teach us lessons about many things. We must stop letting the enemy get us laser focused on the attacks as we stand in the shadow of despair and rather choose to be flooded by God's light and wisdom! God offers a broad view to us through scripture and communication through His Holy Spirit so that we can live in confidence and security that He is in control. We are to look at the One who calms the storms not the one who stirs up dissension!

May your weeds be few, your lessons many and may you choose to walk in God's warm light rather than the shadows of worry.

Psalm 27:1-3, The Lord is my light and the One who saves me! Whom should I fear? The Lord is the strength of my life! Of whom should I be afraid?

Fight, Flight or Love

There have been some issues happening in my life lately that have been making me take a closer look at my heart. Not just my heart but the hearts of others too. These thoughts began coming together yesterday as I viewed a video on Facebook of an out of control woman who freaked out because she couldn't get her chicken McNuggets! Her reaction to the failed request was to fight! Yet, the cashiers response was to protect herself and the managers reaction was to call for assistance. The entire scene made me see so clearly that each of us, depending on the conditions and the posture of our hearts, can be stirred to some level of disturbance and reaction.

What is the condition of our heart? When attacked verbally do we fight back, flee or love? Fighting back is a figurative punch to the opponent to defend our self and to gain the upper hand. We shoot our attacks and feelings of injustice like bullets at their heart. Most likely they are shooting back in order to obtain some control in the confrontation. The heat of the moment becomes a battlefield where all bets are off. Every unspoken feeling is now ammunition in the fight for power. Both have taken the gloves off and damage is the only result!

In another battle strategy, there will be the fighter and then the one who flees. The more aggressive of the two is usually the one being driven by angry or insecure emotions. They will overpower with aggressive gestures that make them look larger. Their voice will take on a tone of mean-spirited sarcasm and they will hurl accusations of blame. They roar so that their victim will cower and be rendered unable to protect themselves. Their sentences begin with words like, "My!", "Mine!", "I, I, I...", "You did...", "You said..." This technique is like a bull kicking up dust, the bullish person creates such a confusing dust storm that they do all the lambasting and then abruptly exit the encounter so as to not have to hear any criticisms of them self.

Passive aggressiveness is another battle plan where someone will punish others with non-aggressive techniques. These actions cause discomfort or pain to their target but allows the agitator to say things such as, "I don't know what you're talking about. I didn't do anything." They reap a sadistic pleasure from toying with their enemy. They believe they can escape any accountability with false naivety. They control those around them with an invisible switch and it's a most effective tool because it keeps the affected one quite confused.

Another tactic is the fight of the co-dependant. They have an internal delight that someone even cares enough for them to engage them in their life and drama. They live for the attention so they feed the negative behavior. Their fight is usually one of appeasement and they will keep the nonsense going just so they have a purpose.

The fifth example is the drama king or queen. They carry a legacy as far back as childhood as being the squeaky wheel in the family. They turn everything into drama and discord which in turn puts all energy and attention on them. Not good energy but negative, destructive and exhausting energy that saps the entire family. These people become indignant that anyone could have the audacity to challenge their demands and feelings! They seem to have this rebellion in their DNA and bring it along as their companion through life. It affects every relationship and situation with unrelenting issues of how others are to blame for everything bad in their life. No one can ever please them and they are not happy until they have stirred the pot with their entitlement.

Then, there is the rarest of all opponents which is the one who loves their enemies. That is the hardest of positions to take because it requires humility and surrender to the God that must work His love through them. This person takes very seriously the command from God, to love their neighbor as them self. This is not a doormat  type of person. In a mature state, this type of person sees the pain and hurt in their accuser and chooses to love their brokenness and see them for who they could be. The one who loves has maturity, boundaries, patience, humility and wisdom. They still feel the pain of the attack but they are not ruled by their emotions. They feel for the accuser and desire better for them. There is a sincere plea and intercession put before God for them and their healing.

No one enjoys criticism because it's painful and exposing. It requires humility, change and growth which are things most people run from. I have been all of these types throughout my life. In retrospect I see the times when I was an aggressive fighter as periods in my life when I was frightened and trying to protect my vulnerable heart. Praise God for people who were lovers that cared for me, were honest with me, prayed for me and had the patience to teach me new ways! I took their honest assessment of some of my behaviors and surrendered that pain and truth before God and He changed me. It hurt and it was hard at first but I would not change that process.

The years I fled from attacks were years when I was so broken that any harsh gesture would have crush me into a million pieces! Although fleeing isn't the answer either, it was better than being aggressive and mean. It gave me a new perspective and I was able to see this whole issue from many other vantage points. Perspective and insight coupled with humility and God's love gave me the fighting chance I needed to become less of the old me and more of the new me! I'm growing from the weak mindset of being a victim into a new paradigm of being a woman of God!

My friends, whatever we speak and act like is an over-flow from our hearts. It is a heart change that we need in order to grow and only a willing and teachable heart can facilitate that. We will all flow in and out of our different reactions throughout our life but our goal should be to grow in a desire to be more Christ-like. How beautiful His character is and His expressions of love toward us even when we're acting ugly. Changing something little and small is better than not changing anything at all. Each repentance, forgiveness, act of love makes us more like Him. My goal has always been to do my old behaviors less and with less intensity. God has been very faithful to take my old character when I offer it to Him and replace it with His character of love. We will never be perfect, that's why we need grace and mercy and most importantly LOVE.

Romans 12:9-10, Be sure your love is true love. Hate what is sinful. Hold on to whatever is good. Love each other as Christian brothers and sisters. Show respect for each other.

1 John 4:7-8, Dear friends, let us love each other because love comes from God. Those who love are God's children and they know God. Those who do not love do not know God because God is love.

1 John 4:11, If God loved us that much, then we should love each other.

Psalm 139:23-24, Search me, Oh God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.

Lord Jesus, Reveal to our hearts, YOU, and the deep love that happened at the cross. Only that revelation can make us see how silly we are at times. Change us, reveal, heal and redeem us! Give us hearts to love and wisdom to deal. Amen.