For What?

Yesterday I was really wiped out physically from all the packing. I'm doing all this with a couple bruised ribs and of course, my lower back went out on top of it. So, I chose the wise thing to do and I rested. I've had a blog post started for about a week now and didn't have time to work on it so what better time to focus and finish it. I spend all day and labored over this precious message that I know God himself gave to me. It was clever, poignant, and full of meaning....and in a matter of a second.....it was erased. My computer froze and in the process of re-booting, the entire post was wiped out.

At first I was in shock that a piece of my soul, mind and spirit, not to mention the wisdom of the Holy Spirit, just evaporated. Then, sorrow paid a visit and I could feel the tears burning as if they were rising from my gut. How could this have happened? Why? Why Lord, would you let all that effort and blessing from Your Holy Spirit just disintegrate? As the evening went on, it all turned into anger, then rage, as I visualized me hacking up my computer with a sharp axe! I couldn't let go of it and it was eating me up.

A good night's sleep guided me to the morning and of course, the first thing I thought of was, the lost blog post! I could feel my jaws clench and my attitude grow sour as I recalled the event of the previous day. "There's no way I'm going to carry this another day Lord. Help me." and I grabbed my daily devotional. Why am I surprised that it spoke directly to my heart? Every time I turn to God, He meets me right where I am and meets my need completely. Every time, and this morning was no different as the words on the page jumped into my heart and mind with accurate aim and healed my bitter soul. The reading went on to speak of a preacher/missionary who gave his life to God but died very young. The gist of it was...."Where was the purpose in the loss?"

Loss...it's such an awful word, and my least favorite word in our vocabulary. Loss is painful, grueling, it seems to be not fair, full of bitterness and the embryo to pain. My loss was insignificant when compared to what the victims of Storm Sandy are going through. It is a spit in the bucket when I judge it next to what my sister is going through with her husband's kidney failing. But, loss is loss, and all loss needs to be grieved! No matter how small or seemingly insignificant it is, we must respect it and grieve it or else it gets buried deep into our psyche and only causes deeper problems.

Although our losses are to be dealt with on a minute by minute basis, allowing God to comfort us and heal us, it is the collateral damage of the loss that needs to be released. Carrying bitterness, anger and resentment only causes us to break down and renders us ill in the matters of healing. Letting go of the barnacles that grow upon our spirits is crucial to being able to handle loss. They serve as only weights that pull us down and leave us drowning in emotions. I found myself this morning asking, "For what?", "Why should I bother pouring my heart out through the written word to just have it consumed by a technological entity!" But God spoke to me this morning telling me through His written word that He has a higher purpose. My lost blog post was lost to Him and it wasn't in vain if I choose to do all things for His glory and not mine.

Beloved, whatever your loss is, loose it unto Him. His mighty, loving hands hold all our sorrows and He saves every tear. He has a higher intention and until we learn to trust Him in all things we will just go about life carrying a sad sack of regrets. Today I choose to see the lost words of my heart laying at His feet. I choose to trust Him and surrender my anger, knowing that He cares for me. I choose to not run to the alter of pride and entitlement but lay prostate before the King of Kings and let Him love me. There are two directions we can go, one is to self, where we focus only on our needs and the other is to God, where all our needs are met. The only true loss is the surrender of our desires, yet, He will fill us and move us forward to do His will....not ours.

Carry on Christian soldiers, unhindered and unafraid.

It matters not how the battle goes, The day how long; Faint not! Fight on! Tomorrow comes the song.

Isaiah 45:11, Concerning the work of my hands command ye me.

Hard Won

Great truths are greatly won, not found by chance, nor wafted on the breath of summer dream; but grasped in the great struggle of our soul, hard buffeting with adverse wind and stream. Author unknown

I awoke this morning as I have been the last few days, at 5 am. The emotions are running high due to the impending move across country. I chose this day though, to arise to a crisp early morning and go to our quiet family room and turn on the warm light, look at some country decor books and read my daily devotional. My expectations were high of having a cuddly serene time on my couch with my cup of coffee and the peace of being alone. Within moments my dogs were rustling and my adorable little Yorkshire Terrier started crawling all over me acting strange. Then as she looked up at me with her sweet face, she threw up all over me and the couch! Within a few minutes my husband came out of the bedroom to start his day and all I could think was, "Seriously!" All I wanted was some serene time in a picture perfect setting and BAM, life was rolling!

I could feel a spirit of anger and frustration come over me as I scrubbed the couch and myself. My quiet morning now had the sound of  dishes being washed and the smell of cleaning products! I wanted to scream, "Can't I even have two minutes to myself!" but instead I chose to go sit outside for a few minutes and pray. "Lord", I said, "I am so tired and stressed from packing and all I wanted was some peace! Can't I have a little normal?" As soon as I murmured those words I heard the sweet voice of the Holy Spirit in my heart whisper, "This is normal."

I have lived my life with the notion that "normal" was something that was realistic and attainable. The events that happened this morning were actually a blessing to my soul. God gave me a lesson and I realized that this lesson will carry me when I otherwise would choose to fall. Normal is all the clammer and happenings that go on in a day. Abnormal is when they aren't happening as part of our life! It's really the abnormal that we should be desiring! The gifts that God gives us are not uninterrupted moments but moments that we allow Him to interrupt! Our greatest blessings are found in Him through the distractions of life.

How many times in our life can we look back on and say, "I wish I did that different." How many times have we let the distractions, mishaps and interruptions of life cause us to take our frustrations out on our loved ones, friends, co-workers or even strangers? I have a quote over my desk that reads, "This is not a disaster....it's an inconvenience!" Friends, let's learn to take a deep breath when life goes awry. Let us learn from the Master, Jesus, who longs to teach us how to take life in stride and keep our peace of soul composed when life becomes bumpy. Pull away from the circumstance and draw near to the Prince of Peace. Women who have children tugging at you, secure the kids and then take even a couple minutes to put some Christian music on in the house. Go and hide in the bathroom for a few moments and keep a daily devotional in there or a bible or journal. Men, go out to the garage or take a short walk before your fuse hits the powder. Anything is better than hurting ourselves or someone else with words of anger. Breath and pray.

Ephesians 6:12 states, "For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." This paragraph goes on to describe to believers how to put on the armor of God. I suggest reading it for it is our only hope in a world of constant attacks. Satan's only goal is to get people to believe that God won't help them. That they are alone and helpless with their life. Don't let that lie rob you of all God wants for you. When life goes crazy don't blame God, blame the evil one that seeks only to rob and destroy. God is our refuge and He came to save not tear down the ones He loves.

Another thing that I learned this morning is to laugh more. Life and all its troubles and frustrations can weight us down to a point where we become cave dwellers. Laughter lifts us up to the sky where there is fresh air and views of hope! Learning to laugh and smile helps us to not take ourselves or inconveniences so seriously. Pride and entitlement can be an awful trigger to anger and selfish behavior! Change your pride to prayer.

These battles are not easy, they are hard won. But, with a commitment to choose God in the ludicrous events of life we can find wisdom rather than foolishness, peace as opposed to frustration and joy instead of anger. Beloved, in every trial and situation there is a sweet lesson from God that can take our character from one of poor stature to one of integrity. Choose this day who you will serve, the god of this earth who brings frustration, anger, malice, pride, regret, sorrow, shame....OR the God of love, who desires to transform you into a person gifted with wisdom, adorned with honor, instilled with peace and overflowing with joy. Knock each small frustration down with a prayer before they build up and make you act unbecomingly.

1 John 3:1, "How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!" 

Prince of Peace

God is so good! He assuages our fears and replaces our anxieties with His peace. One prayer at a time He is faithful and powerful to lift our spirits by filling us with His Spirit of comfort and strength. How many moments in our life do we waste because we hold on to our worries and not set them at His feet of grace?

Last week we went to NY and visited our son and his family. While there we ended up buying a house! In a matter of a few days we had made a decision that would change every paradigm in our lives. Needless to say, the anxiety started rolling over us like category five hurricane winds. The old me would be curled up in a ball mumbling like a shell shocked soldier but God knew what was in our future and I can see so clearly how He prepared me for this monumental change. I trust Him now like never before and truly believe that all His intentions for me are good ones. Jeremiah 29:11 says, "For I (God), know the plans I have for you, they are plans to prosper you, not harm you, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when u pray, I will listen. You will find me when you seek me, if you look for me with all your heart." There has never been a time when I sought God and He wasn't there for me!

Our new journey will bring waves of doubt, fear, anxiety, confusion, exhaustion....but our God is bigger than all those things, even if they all hit at the same time! Isaiah 41:10 says, "Do not fear for I am with you; do not be dismayed for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand." Zephaniah 3:17, "I am with you, I am mighty to save. I will take great delight in you. I will quiet you with My love. I will rejoice over you with singing." Beloved, God is singing over you!

Before we left for NY God gave me a scripture that proved to be a lifeline! I read it from a book and forgot where it was exactly in the bible but memorized it, "For I am the Lord your God who holds your right hand, and who says to you, "Do not be afraid, I will help you." Through the entire week I paraphrased it as if Jesus were standing right next to me and looking down at me. I kept looking up at Him and picturing Him smiling down at me saying, "Come on little one, I'm your God, take my right hand, don't be afraid because I'm with you all the way and I'll help you with everything." The Sunday after we got to NY I decided to stay home (at my son's house) and just rest with the Lord while the others went to church. I took my son's bible and opened it and there was that scripture! Isaiah 41:13, the Word that God had personally given to me was right there before me! That was not a coincidence! Our God is a personal God who speaks to us if we seek Him!

As I read many chapters in Isaiah, God spoke to me in waves of love as He unfolded scripture after scripture to me of His great and powerful promises. Isaiah 26:3,4 - Isaiah 45:3,4, "I have carried you since your birth...I will continue to be with you and sustain you, even when you are old. I will always carry you; I will always sustain you; I will always rescue you. Keep your mind focused on Me and I will keep you in perfect peace." I encourage you to read the book of Isaiah in the Old Testament, chapters 40-66 and glean from it what God wants to say to you personally. Underline the parts that speak to your heart, write some on note cards and put them in your car, on your bathroom mirror, next to your bed, by your kitchen sink or on your desk. Let God's Word sink deep into you and grow deep roots that no storm can uproot!

Do you need peace? Then seek the Prince of Peace and He will be right there to rescue you. Matthew chapter 14, verses 23-33, Night fell, and out on the lake the disciples were in trouble. For the wind had risen and they were fighting heavy seas. About four o'clock in the morning Jesus came to them, walking on the water! They screamed in terror, for they thought He was a ghost. But Jesus immediately spoke to them, reassuring them. "Don't be afraid." He said. Then Peter called to Him, "Sir, if it is really you, tell me to come over to you, walking on the water." "All right," the Lord said, "come along!" So Peter went over the side of the boat and walked on the water toward Jesus. But, when he looked around at the high waves, he was terrified and began to sink. "Save me Lord!" he shouted. INSTANTLY, Jesus reached out His hand and rescued him. "O man of little faith," Jesus said. "Why did you doubt me?" And when they had climbed back into the boat, the wind stopped. The others sat there, awestruck. "You really are the Son of God!" they exclaimed.

Beloved, If you cry out to Jesus, He will be there instantly to rescue you. It may seem as though your circumstances aren't changing sometimes but think of how many ways we need to be rescued!  He will lift your head when you feel downcast, fill your empty soul, quench your needs, carry you through, give you peace in the storm, send a kind person, give you a worthy task to keep you busy through a mentally or emotionally trying time....He will always be there.

Prince of Peace, Lover of my Soul,

There is no place You will not go;

To rescue me and comfort me,

Whatever my fear, I am not alone.

I will keep you in perfect peace if you will keep your mind steadfast on Me and always trust Me...I am a Rock you can always stand on. Isaiah 26:3-4

Worrying does not empty tomorrow of its troubles, it empties today of its strength!

 

 

Yoke of Slavery

In the book of Galatians, chapter 5, verse 1, it reads, "It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery." The past week has been monumental for me in regards to freedom. I have struggled for years with bouts of depression and have always felt like a helpless victim to it. I believed that it was a dark cloud that slowly creeped over me and there was nothing that I could do about. I tried medication but it made me feel very disconnected from my passions in life and it didn't help the depression either. I actually received more relief from changing my diet and being more steadfast in my relationship with Christ. Last week I turned fifty four and there was a big part of me that wanted to look back at those past years and think of them as a sad waste. But, God gave me a fantastic birthday gift this year and opened my mind to some new truths!

Last Thursday I was at bible study and one of the women there said something that changed me. She said, "Stop thinking like the Greeks. They would look at everything and wonder, "Where is the reasoning in that?" We must think like Gods people, like the Jews did, and ask instead, "Where can I see God in that?" I had been exhausting myself all my life with a deep rooted need to understand not only the things in my own life but also why there was so much pain and suffering in the entire globe! This week God reached into me and spoke to the deepest part of my psyche, bringing me an awakening of His fathomless love. He knew I was finally ready to hear it, that I had finally put my anger on His alter and wanted to sacrifice it to Him. I was willing to let Him change me.

We all have operating assumptions (OA) that we default to whenever we become perplexed. Someone may find themselves in a conversation where they might have to start taking responsibility for some of their actions so they would resort to their OA of responding with, "I don't know what to tell you! That's just the way I am!" or "I never do that! You're crazy!" and so on. This week the Holy Spirit shined a bright light on one of mine! Whenever a situation would happen where I felt uncertain, overwhelmed, discouraged, afraid....I would withdraw into depression so I wouldn't have to deal with it. It was also a safe zone for me to have a place to gather my thoughts and re-group for whatever was coming. Well, more of a not-so-safe-zone since it was a defense mechanism rather than a coping mechanism. Albeit, OA's can be a constructive, positive way of dealing with changes that are required of us or they can be destructive and negative, where they not only hurt us but those around us!

God showed me that I had to change my OA's or else I was doomed to a life of self victimization. I saw first hand how much God loves me and wants me free of ANY yoke of slavery! I had one of my worse storms of depression after this epiphany and it knocked me down at first but the Holy Spirit would not let the work He had begun in me to not be completed!(Phil 1:6). I felt it as it happened, He opened up areas of reality in my mind and for the first time, I got out of bed, stood up and said to myself, "I wonder what would happen if I didn't go into that depression? What if I didn't default to my old way?, so I pressed onward to see, and praise God, it wasn't the horror that I thought it would be! All those years the enemy (satan) had me believing the lie that it was too scary to face my fears. On the other side of that dark, creeky, cob-web covered door...........was light and hope and joy! I challenged my OA and found that the most frightening place was where I was holding myself prisoner, in my own fears.

What bars are you behind? People are living their lives with strongholds that are keeping them from all that God desires for them. Is your prison a sexual one, filled with pornography, unclean thoughts  or maybe infidelity and lies? Do you harbor fantasies that if exposed you would be humiliated? Some live lives of denial and never grow. Some are so angry that they have no peace and won't allow those around them any either. There are prison bars of secret abuse, alcohol, drugs, slothfulness, gluttony (how many of you use food as your drug?). We can be held captive by envy, jealousy, hatred toward others or self, unforgiveness, pride. Or, maybe you are a liar or live live in a prison of guilt and shame. I don't have to pick just one because I suffer with many and that's precisely why we need a Savior! If you don't think so then ponder for a moment on how many "things" or "people" that you idolize with your TIME all while you're ignoring the Lover of your soul, Jesus, who sacrificed His own life for you.

Matthew 11:29 reads, "Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light." Compare that to all the junk we stuff our life and bodies with! Matthew 6:33....Seek first His kingdom and righteousness and all these other things will be given to you. God came for the sinners not the shiny! Bring your problems, your trash, your filth....to Him and He will honor that obedience with an outpouring of His boundless love, compassion and limitless power to help you to overcome anything! Stop living in the dark, the lies, the fears and go through that frightening door to find salvation, light, grace, mercy, healing and love. God wants you to be free of the yoke of slavery and He wants to have a relationship with you. If you want your religion to be a living relationship then say this prayer:

Father in heaven, You gave your precious Son's life up for me so that I could be free. Free from the bondage of the enemy, free from lingering strongholds, free from death. I want to invite your Son into my heart to be my Savior and into my life to be my Lord. I confess that I am a sinner and that no matter how good of a person I am, it is only by the spilt blood of Your Son that I can be saved. I don't want to be a slave to anything or anyone but You. Everything You did, all that You do and all that You are going to do are done in love and done for your children. Thank you for adopting me and making me Your own from this day forward. Amen

John 3:16, "For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."

There is no place too low for the Savior to bring love and light and show you the way out....if you would just ask Him.

A Prayer

Lord of all Creation,

Balance me today. Balance my thoughts, my desires, my cravings. Balance my responses, my reactions, my interactions. Lord, balance the heart within me from which all things flow and balance my mind, body and soul. You, O Lord, who holds the endless universe in perfect balance, who can suspend planets in mid-air and who tells the sea where to stop, balance me today.

Make Your will - my will, Your desires - my desires. Remind me all day that through Your Holy Spirit, anything that comes into my life has had to come through You first and that everything is a lesson to grow from. Let me not expect life to be easy but to know that it will be an interesting, fascinating and sometimes puzzling journey of joys and sorrows and that I will never walk it alone. Keep me mindful that every bad thing has goodness to be found in it, if we will only look for it. And, when our plans do not fit Your plan - bless me with peace that Your plan is best and that it is safe to follow You anywhere.

Our purpose here is not to be comfortable but to be comforting, not to be stuffed with empty "things" of this earth but to be content with whatever we have and to share it with others. Balance me today in every way, encourage me to release the things I covet, and desire above all that You alone fill my wanting hands and heart.

Make my day a prayer to you, so I am connected to You every moment. Let not my pride think that I can do anything apart from You. Give me a constant hunger in my heart to be satisfied and filled only by You and to recognize You as my full portion. Above all Lord, reveal and cement in my heart Your deep and committed love that you have for me. Make me ever thirsty for Your Word and Your presence in my life. Let noone and no thing rob me of Your gift of peace knowing that Your Holy Spirit has filled me and I am sealed by Him, the giver of all Your gifts. Give me Your wisdom generously to be able to stand in all hope of You.

You are my Redeemer, my Savior, Lover of my soul and my friend. May all those I pray for find You to be all those things to them also. Whatever shape each persons emptiness is - fill it perfectly Lord as only You can do. Whenever one of them is alone, worried or scared, let Your presence comfort them and assure them. Show the lost that You are the Way and that Your truth and light will guide them and give them hope. May our desire be to see You glorified in our lives. Amen

The Square

I did this painting to represent
that we can live our life in a box
or break it and turn it into a road
that can lead somewhere.

It's one of my favorite things that God does, He takes all my anxiety and frustration about things that are going on in my head, heart and life and He reveals His wisdom regarding it all through a t.v. show! He has been doing this a lot lately and the epiphanies have been mind blowing! Thoughts and feelings in my deepest recesses that I cannot figure out and are sources of great frustration to me, He brings into focus and clarity during a thirty minute show! Whoever says that God isn't rockin doesn't know Him!

We've been watching old re-runs of Cold Case recently and it's a really interesting show. They investigate a cold case but they show the characters in current and past venues as the story unfolds. The other night there was a story about these young boys that were abused at an orphanage. Their ward attendant would make them stand in this 2'x2' square marked out with tape on the floor to punish them for the actions of just one kid. They were forced to stand for hours on end and you can only imagine the physical and psychological damage it did to them! After the show ended and I layed in my bed, the Holy Spirit began to unfold layer after layer of memories out before me and connected them with this awful feeling of being in a 2'x2' square! This anger that has been deep inside me, that I kept burying, started to rise and I could now put names to the faces! There were many issues with faces now and I felt this kind of relief settle over me because I was beginning to understand.

In our lives there are people who push, people who nudge, some make suggestions, some scare us, others may encourage us, some convince us.....to get in that square. It's where "they" are comfortable having us NOT where we are happy or where God wants us to be. How many of us have allowed someone to coax us into a square that suits their needs more than ours? How many of us have or are doing that to others? I used to be a fighter, I mean in spirit, and I pushed back when I felt someone trying to box me into "their" comfort zone. I didn't go willingly into other people's agendas just to make "them" comfortable. Yet, as I grew up I fought it a little less and started to put the feelings of others before my own, which was not a smart thing. It's perfectly fine to have manners regarding others but we are not to surrender our boundaries to be replaced by some other persons lack of! Most of us humans have this silent agenda in life and that is to get everyone around us to be agreeable so that our life can be absent of pain. I went from an immature fighter to an immature victim and couldn't find my way to a healthy perspective. Then, I prayed, and God showed me this revelation!

"Be." Yes, that's the revelation. Be active, be aware, be respectful (to yourself and to others), be happy, be sad (when appropriate), be honest, forthright, firm, kind,.......But "Be" something! Don't let everyone else determine who and what you are to Be. We complain almost constantly about how others are affecting our lives and never realize that they are herding us into a 2'x2' square. As we allow them to affect our thoughts, feelings, actions, moods.....we are allowing them to corral us into what is comfortable for them and most assuredly not what is best for us. The time we could be spending on doing beautiful things is then spent expressing a complaining spirit! I'm not saying to fight everyone or to supress your feelings, I'm just saying to be aware of other peoples agendas, whether conscience or sub-conscience. And, don't forget to watch yourself carefully, because we all do it to someone!

I allowed others so much power over my life that I eventually faded to grey. I became discouraged and felt I had no control over anything so I just surrendered. I didn't have the strength to self-protect and it was just too exhausting to try and push back anymore. It's a long and complicated saga but what I'm really hoping is that YOU will take this revelation and use it as a flashlight in your own life and use it to shine outward too so that you can be more aware of the hidden agendas around you. God wants you to have joy, yet so many of us settle for lives filled with guilt and shame. There is a balance and a middle in life if we would just be honest with others and ourselves and stop letting fear rule in our hearts. We are afraid to be honest with someone because they could reject us if we draw firm boundaries with them. We fear embarassment to ourselves or fear embarrasing others. We fear failure, success, happiness, retaliation, change......Trust me, it is scarier where you are than where you want to go.

I discovered that by just taking some action steps that bettered my life and by allowing those new actions in my life to define my creative soul, I stepped out of the square and the influence and nudging of others sloughed off. I found freedom by choosing to "be" some things that were unique to me. I began to discover "me" again. I know that sounds like a cliche' but after years of being a daughter, sister, friend, girl-friend, wife, mother.....I lost "me". I had to learn how to "be" the new "me"! I began actively doing my art again, riding my bike, going for walks, going to the beach, to the mountains, writing, dancing (alone in my bedroom to Hit list), sending out cards again! I stepped out of the square that I had allowed myself to be nudged into and stretched my arms out wide. I took a deep breath and began to see with fresh eyes all the things I had hidden away. The things I loved to do and be. I'm not saying to go get a divorce or move your kids to an over-seas boarding school, I'm just saying to step out of the square and start "Be"ing  some of you again! Make a "Be" list and write down some of the things you used to do that made you, "you". Stop complaining and "Be"come a person that does things. Take a class, sit alone in a comfortable chair in a quiet room, read, swim, volunteer, be social, walk someones dog for them, bake, garden, join a choir.......Stop feeling guilty that you haven't given enough to your family! Teach those around you about the new "healthy boundaries" that you're implementing and tell them that you expect them to have respect for them! Be an example of a person who has peace and structure. Those around you will be better people for it. Do you want to be able or an enabler? For the love of God Be kind to yourself! Treat yourself with as much love as you do others! Stop letting "them" push you back into that square. You are an adult and you can make the decision to cut yourself a slice of the pie, sit, relax and enjoy it (literally or metaphorically). Read "The Pit and the Gate" post under archives on the side bar of this post for some boundary lessons.

So, while you're out there "Be"ing, remember to Be aware of how you are affecting others. Don't box your children, your spouse, friends, or whomever......so they can't Be who they were meant to be. Don't let your fears keep them from their full potential. Learn and teach good boundaries and allow the freedom from fear to open up pockets of individual creativity. Balance is a good thing. A balanced person is much more effective for God and the community! Be what you wish others would Be towards you. This revelation has brought me a new freedom and joy. I discovered though, that there was a small part of me that missed the power of complaining and blaming. But, the new freedom is so much better, so I'm choosing that, at least more often than not. You can't change anyone around you BUT you can change you. Go and Be.........

Psalm Twenty

Whom do you trust? Do you have a source for all you need or do you try to do life all on your own, resulting in fatigue, despair, exhaustion and loneliness? Do you have a living-breathing supporter that can be with you and give you victory in all things 24/7? Do you live with complete confidence and victory on a daily, moment by moment basis? In Psalm 20, King David says a blessing, a prayer, over himself and his troops, reminding them that they do have a conqueror who goes before them and they can have confidence that in and through their God there will be victory! Verse 1 says, "In your day of trouble, may the Lord be with you." That verse confirms what we all know to be true and that is, there will be trouble in our lives. I don't know about you but my answer is "yes", I do want the Lord to be with me. May you desire that also.

Verse 4, "May He grant you your heart's desire and fulfill all your plans!" Our prayer should always be that God would make His desires our desires. When we are in God's perfect will then all that we ask is good for us and He delights in giving to His children. It's when we think that we know what is best and we don't consider His wisdom as truth, that He can't bless our plans. If we walk behind Him then we are certainly afraid of trusting Him, if we walk ahead of Him then we put our own pride before God. He wants to walk through life "with" us, side by side, as our friend. May you desire that also.

As King David prayed....... I offer this prayer for me and you.....

Lord of all Creation,

Balance me today. Balance my thoughts, my desires, my cravings. Balance my responses, my reactions, my interactions. Lord, balance the heart within me from which all things flow and balance my mind, body and soul. You, O Lord, who holds the endless universe in perfect balance, who can suspend planets in mid-air and who tells the sea where to stop, balance me today.

Make Your will - my will, Your desires - my desires. Remind me all day that through Your Holy Spirit, anything that comes into my life has had to come through You first and that everything is a lesson to grow from. Let me not expect life to be easy but to know that it will be an interesting, fascinating and sometimes puzzling journey of joys and sorrows and that I will never walk it alone. Keep me mindful that every bad thing has goodness to be found in it, if we will only look for it. And, when our plans do not fit Your plan - bless me with peace that Your plan is best and that it is safe to follow You anywhere.

Our purpose here is not to be comfortable but to be comforting, not to be stuffed with empty "things" of this earth but to be content with whatever we have and to share it with others. Balance me today in every way, encourage me to release the things I covet, and desire above all that You alone fill my wanting hands and heart.

Make my day a prayer to you, so I am connected to You every moment. Let not my pride think that I can do anything apart from You. Give me a constant hunger in my heart to be satisfied and filled only by You and to recognize You as my full portion. Above all Lord, reveal and cement in my heart Your deep and committed love that you have for me. Make me ever thirsty for Your Word and Your presence in my life. Let noone and no thing rob me of Your gift of peace knowing that Your Holy Spirit has filled me and I am sealed by Him, the giver of all Your gifts. Give me Your wisdom generously to be able to stand in all hope of You.

You are my Redeemer, my Savior, Lover of my soul and my friend. May all those I pray for find You to be all those things to them also. Whatever shape each persons emptiness is - fill it perfectly Lord as only You can do. Whenever one of them is alone, worried or scared, let Your presence comfort them and assure them. Show the lost that You are the Way and that Your truth and light will guide them and give them hope. May our desire be to see You glorified in our lives. Amen

Psalm Nineteen

Psalm 19 is amazing! David the psalmist records his meditations to the God he loves and that loves him, proclaiming the evidence of the Creators greatness, creativity and love. Vs 1, "The heavens declare the glory of God, the skies proclaim the work of His hands." How many times have we seen a spectacular sunset, a misty and transforming sunrise awakening a new day? Think of the nights we have gazed at the stars, some even studying them and using them to guide them. The shade of a tree, the song of a bird, a cool breeze.....a mountain view, an eagle soaring, a rainbow. Those being the grandest, not to mention the thousands upon thousands of minute miracles that happen constantly around us daily such as the complex functions of our bodies, the eco-system's balance or the simple love of a pet. Nature sings of God's glory!

Verse 3 says, "There is no speech or language where their voice is not heard." meaning that God gave us nature to see His greatness and love in and no words or interpretation are needed for that story to be heard. Romans 1:19-20 reaffirms by saying, "....since what may be known about God is plain to them, because God has made it plain to them. For since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities, His eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse." Then, in verse 4 of the 19th psalm, "Their voice goes out into all the earth, their words to the end of the world." God's Word asserts that no one can say that He doesn't exist because He is evident in all of creation!

The author then moves on to God's Word and what it means for us. Vs 7-11 (paraphrased), "The Lords law is perfect, it revives our soul, His statutes making wise the simple, His precepts bring joy to our hearts, His commands give light to our eyes, the fear of the Lord is pure, enduring forever and His ordinances are sure and altogether righteous!" Vs 10-11, "They are more precious than gold, than much pure gold; they are sweeter than honey, than honey from the comb. By them is your servant warned; in keeping them there is great reward!" By being in God's Word we can have our souls revived, be wise, have joy in our hearts, see things clearly and have a healthy respect for God that in turn, shines out toward our neighbors and the world, whereas, they then see God in us!

Without first accepting that you do see God in everything, then, desiring His guidance through His Word, we most often find ourselves dissatisfied and unhappy. We have patterns of making wrong decisions and feeling tired and discouraged in our souls because of constant battles in our minds over regrets or trying to justify certain actions or behaviors that were wrong or inappropriate. My many years of growing up in the 70's without much supervision and trying to avoid God left me with large empty holes in my soul that have taken years to clean out and fill with what I should have filled them with in the first place, God! I lived with my mind believing lies about God, that all He wanted to do was take from me and I never knew about the goodness of how He wanted to give me lovely things and make me feel worthy and cherished! How can anyone feel loved by God or know all the goodness He has for us if we don't develop a friendship with Him? Spending time in prayer, in His Word, having fellowship with other believers.....that's how you get to know someone and what they're really all about. That's how you fall in love! God already loves you, so it's just a matter of you loving Him.

Verses 12-14 ring of truth and freedom to me, "Who can discern his errors? Forgive my hidden faults." Vs 13, "Keep your servant also from willful sins; may they not rule over me. Then I will be blameless, innocent of great transgression." Vs 14, "May the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer." Apart from desiring God and all that He desires for you, there is only lies that rob our joy and slavery that robs our freedoms! How much of your life has been in the repair shop rather than out enjoying life? How many more regrets and sorrows infiltrate your thoughts than do memories of good choices? Sure, there are people  who have not wandered in life too much but there are more of us that have walked the murky paths of regrets and are in desperate need of a Savior! God promises to take His soiled children, bathe us in His Son's sacrifice and forgiveness, clothe us in His righteousness and set our feet upon the Rock, which is Him!

Psalm 19 reminds us to look at everything as evidence of God's existence, to seek the truth about Him through His written Word and  to always find love at His feet through honest confession. He is real and He will always meet us wherever we are...simply because He loves us.

God is in the trees,
God is in the seas;
God is in the air,
God is everywhere.

God is in the miles,
God is in the smiles;
God is in each child,
God is everywhere.

If you don't see Him......it's because you don't want to. If you want to.....then go and see Him everywhere and in everything!

James 4:8, God says, "Draw near to Me and I will draw near to you."