Eye Roll

You know that certain kind of breath that especially teenagers take where they breathe in and at the same time their eyes are rolling back and then the exhale comes out as like a huff? You know that kind of sound and gesture that makes you feel unheard and that you have nothing of value to share in life. Well, the Lord pointed out to me last week that I do that all the time. Whether it be in traffic which is where it happens the most. Or, how about if you're sink is full of dishes and you pump the dish soap and it's empty! What about a family member that disagrees with you on everything and all you want to do is have a nice meal but it never turns out that way. It could also be your spouse or your child when they hear something and it's so profound to them that it's life-changing but you've told them the same thing a thousand times in the past. It happens a hundres times a day when you drop something or can find what you're looking for... This list could go on and on and I encourage you to write down your personal "eye roll" experiences. God doesn't care for the eye roll or the huff. He wants a whole different attitude from us and toward others.

For the past week the Lord has been using his Holy Spirit to shine a light on all of my "eye rolls". Because I have surrendered so many times for so many things that I want him to change in me I pretty quickly asked him what he was trying to tell me. It was pretty simple, he wanted me to exude joy instead of frustration and apathy. What really drove the message home from God was a certain situation. The other day a friend popped by and said that they would text before they were coming which they did but I didn't hear it. I was in my grungy cleaning clothes and about to clean this disgusting shelf unit that I brought up from the basement then, the doorbell rang. You would have thought that something devastating happened by the way I reacted. I usually wake up every morning and put on the armor of God, say good morning to him, ask him to fill my thoughts and then I pray and ask him to make my Divine appointments for the day. Well that's exactly what he was doing but at that moment I was just not having it. I was so upset that I got interrupted. I pulled it together went down put on a smile and greeted my friend. She had brought her mom with her who is 101 years old and she had her out in the car. It was a gorgeous beautiful sunshiny day, the leaves had just a little touch of the morning Frost left on them and the trees were in full color. I had put on my cozy blanket fleece and wrapped my big wool scarf around me. It was like something you would see in a movie, a gorgeous fall day with a friend stopping by. However, in my heart I had this angst about being interrupted. Then my friend who is so perky, fun and lovely asked me to come and pray with her mom who was in the car. Of course I wanted to do that and see her mom who I've known for years and years. We stood by her mom's car door talking but I could tell she was getting cold so my friend said let's sit in the car, you sit in the front seat by my mom and you can say a prayer. I sat in the car and as I started to pray my friend was asking all these questions about God. The Holy Spirit was speaking through me all these beautiful scenarios and scriptures about God's love. Her mom kept looking over at me and smiling and I just reached over and held her hand. My friend is the best daughter I've personally have ever seen. She loves her mom so much and dotes on her by taking care of her so beautifully. It was a Divine appointment when she invited me into the car to pray. I was able to answer all of those questions and talk to them through the Holy Spirit about God's love and salvation. The entire experience, from the crisp fall morning, being bundled up in tartan, my fiends bubbling personality, her precious and fragile sweet mom, God fulfilled his purpose in our lives that day, which made that time irreplaceable and holy.

After they left and I went back into the house. I stood there looking out the window at the beautiful nature scene before me and thinking what a lovely moment in time I just had with my dear friend and her mom. I felt so ashamed because of that angst that stirred up inside of me making me feel so disrupted and inconvenienced at the moment of her arrival. Then, the Lord asked me, which would you rather do, clean a filthy shelf from the basement or have the experience of this Divine appointment that I just gave you. And he basically told me that he doesn't want me to act the way that I did anymore. The Spirit spoke to me for quite a few days about huffing and puffing, rolling my eyes, shaking my head and busying myself to the point of missing what HE has for me. 

This whole experience, tied in with something I've been struggling with for the past few years. That is how everyone is so busy! We don't do a lot of the friend or family stuff that we used to do. Those moments are far and few between. Life seems to be in hyperspeed. It feels like I'm choking back a sadness, it feels like grieving. I became, like the others, so immersed in projects that I didn't feel the absence of the human touch till it was acute. Here I was, too busy cleaning a filthy shelf to actually see the gift that was in front of me at the time. 

Brothers and sisters, I encourage you to not start your day without the Lord. To have an open heart, to let him love on you and remind you what is really important before your feet hit the floor. Grace, Grace, Grace. Give it to others, give it to yourself. Ask God every morning to fill you to overflowing so that it spills out over you. Ask him for a soft heart to accept his plans over your own. Our job is not to judge but to love. We are to bring people into the presence of God through prayer and ask God to convict their hearts and show them his lavish love. That's the work HE does inside of people. The outside work is when he calls on us to surrender our own time and to be his hands and feet. Showing others that they are important, seen and heard. To serve others when he calls on us to do so. So take a deep breath in the morning and let him turn your raging river of thoughts, errands and duties into still waters. Sit there with him in the green pasture. Let him calm you and invite him to go before you into that day. Never forget that HE IS plan A. Our agenda is Plan B. God is in the detours so don't freak out (like I did:) A spirit of peace, joy, gratitude and thankfulness will keep him first in our lives.

Note: We all have those "off" days where we are tired, overwhelmed, distracted, not feeling well.... We all fall short sometimes. Tell God you're sorry, learn from it, grow from it and do better next time.

Matthew 11:28-30, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest...

2 Corinthians 12:9, His grace will be sufficient for me for his strength is made perfect in my weakness.

Matthew 6:33, "But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness: and all these things shall be added unto you.

Wait For It...

There is a GLORY STORY in every situation. Nothing happens apart from God's plan. It may be exciting or it can be painful. But, God has a GRAND PLAN. We will see the other side of the tapestry one day and we will understand. However, until then, he will be with us through it all. His Spirit, his presence, his love, his comfort... He hates to see us suffer but we are called to share in the sufferings of Christ (1Peter 4:13). When pain comes and it will (John 16:33, 1 Peter 4:12), be sure to blame the enemy and not God. There will be Justice one day. I think the worst pain is to lose a loved one but we must find our comfort in Jesus. We will enter into Paradise and see our loved ones again. There will be no more tears, pain or suffering.

If you think that they weren't saved when they died then you have to remember that God visits everyone before they die (psalm 48:14b). I know this from experience and from stories from many people. He visits them because he desires that no one should perish. Find comfort in that. If your loved one died but they suffered, remember that when Steven was being stoned (Acts 7:56), heaven opened up and he saw the face of Jesus. Your loved ones are no longer in pain and they wouldn't want you to be in pain, so miss them and grieve their loss but don't feel their pain. They are free now. Rejoice in that for them. And above all, we will all be together again one day living in his glory! So, take your pain and sorrow to him and let him comfort you. The sin of this world is what causes pain but Jesus is coming back, Justice will be done and we have eternity to be together basking in nothing but joy. 

Psalm 34:14, God is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

Revelation 21:4, He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain...

2 Peter 3:9, .. God is patient and desires no one to perish...

My mother died when I was young and I miss her everyday. I used to blame God but in his great loving kindness he showed me the truth I spoke about above. He showed me his enduring love that pursues us until the very last chance for people to accept his gift of salvation. He never ever ever gives up on a soul. People may reject him even until the end but he never stops pursuing his creation with his love. No one is ever hopeless as long as God is there. 

Shalom