There is a Time for Every Season Under Heaven. Ecclesiastes 3:1

As the years have gathered my days, I've grown. I have come to a point in my life where I truly enjoy God! I let Him love me and I love Him back! I let Him comfort me and I then go and comfort others. I don't blame God any more but, I see Him in everything! The journey IS life, we will never arrive as long as we walk on this earth so I've learned to see each day, each moment as a chapter in my life's journal whether it be a great day or a dark season, God is in it with me.

I'm also aware that the enemy is always prowling about with one mission in mind, to rob me of my joy and to get me to doubt God. There are times when I lend ear to the whispered lies and I become ensnared. Not for the long lengths of time as when I was younger and thought God was responsible for pain and suffering. I've grown in the grace and knowledge of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and I find myself falling much less and for shorter periods of time. That's because I read God's Word each day and I have a personal relationship with Him!

I have struggled with worthlessness because of the things that happened to me in my life. Growing and healing is a process and He is teaching me about many things that I look forward to sharing! This blog is a place for my thoughts to find their voice! I hope you enjoy visiting here just as if you were going to a friends house.

Jesusdeevah is a name I chose because it reminds me that I am set apart, special, precious and treasured by my Father in Heaven! So much that He sent His only beloved Son, Jesus, to suffer and die for me! Then, on the third day He rose from the grave and conquered sin and death so that I could be with Him forever! The lie is that I'm worthless, the truth is that I am worth dying for!

John 3:16,17... For God so loved the world that He gave His only Son so that whosoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life! God did not send His Son into the world to condemn it but to save it!

*If any of these posts contain knowledge and wisdom that you have already gleaned then please consider sharing them by clicking on the M icon at the bottom of the post and emailing it to someone that may be struggling or hungry for this kind of message. Someone told me once, "It's not always what you're going to get from someone but sometimes it's about what someone may get from you!" Sharing is caring :)

These are my thoughts and stories....Please remember that a Blog goes backwards. The history builds up to the present posts. Check out the archives for background.

Folllow me on Instagram @Jesusdeevah for truth and inspiration or @ugobun to follow my art.

Monday, March 18, 2019

Don't Give Up

Who's Zerubbabel? I wasn't aware of him until I opened my bible the other day and decided to read what I opened it up to. Coincidence? No. I've read my bible cover to cover quite a few times but there is a huge difference between reading your bible and having God speak to you through it. God introduced me to Zerubbabel because he knew I would need this lesson just a few days later.

The last couple weeks were very difficult for me for many reasons. We all know that difficult times either set us running in our own strength or remind us to sit at the Savior's feet. I was pretty much winging it on my own. By that I mean that I didn't open up my bible or reach out for prayer... I felt myself sinking deeper and feeling more alone. Upon awakening this morning I felt the prodding of the Holy Spirit to get close to God but I chose to start a project first. Needless to say, my project turned into a hot mess and I just starting crying. While sitting at my desk with tears flowing I looked up and saw my bible open to The Book Of Ezra with the profile of Zerubbabel before me. The first sentence read, "Sometimes God's ownership of a project is only recognized after our best efforts have failed." My tears turned to laughter as I realized that the God of the Universe just spoke to me in a very personal way!

God's people had been exiled to Babylon for many years. In 539 B.C. Babylon was defeated by the Persian ruler Cyrus. He allowed the Jews to return to Jerusalem to rebuild the temple and Zerrubabel was the man chosen to lead the job. Long story short, he met some resistance and gave up on the project. His excitement turned to discouragement and hopelessness. It wasn't until sixteen years later that God sent the prophets Haggai and Zechariah to encourage him to restart and finish the temple. Zerubbabel lacked tenacity and faith when times got hard. When encouragement from the people stopped he stopped. He exhausted his own strength but did not turn to God for the strength to carry on.

John 15:5 says, "I am the vine; you are the branches.If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing." As I sit here in Upstate New York looking out my window, my yard looks like a tornado hit. There are dead branches all over our property! They are no longer connected to their source of life so they must be burned because their purpose is gone. Staying connected to God's power, purpose and joy is a moment by moment choice. When what we have been called to do becomes wearisome, unpopular, lonely... it is only the choice of drawing near to him that empowers us. Galatians 6:9 reads, "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don't give up."

Zerubbabel may have given up but God did not give up on him. God will NEVER give up on us. His grace and mercy are bigger than us and he will always pursue us with his love. Seek him first, proclaim his might and find your strength in him. By the way, after I put God first and gave the project to him, it all worked out perfect.

Hebrews 4:7b, "Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts."

Tuesday, March 5, 2019

Beautiful Brokenness

Are we willing to be broken??? Our first reaction is to cry, "No! " However, my most precious moments were when I was broken in the presence of God. I felt full, whole and safe even as the storm raged around me. Compare that to when I am living out of my own strength and telling God to keep up behind me. My mind is overwhelmed, my spirit weak and empty, my body aching, dragging, my heart frightened and racing. We plow along like that because "we haven't physically and mentally broke yet!" We chase adrenaline, caffeine, sugar.... Squeezing every last drop out of our own abilities and trying to avoid breaking because we are so afraid to go there! Satan actually fools us into believing that it is the crash that represents God when in truth we are the ones who crashed and burned because we tried to live apart from God's love and strength!

The actual brokenness is beautiful. It's not a state of exhaustion but a voluntary step into the presence of God. We stand before him before we break in our own strength. We ask him to break anything in us that is self reliant and to give us a humble heart to trust him, follow him and work it all out for us. It's a nest of protection and unconditional love where we rest, laugh and confide with the One who adores us and restores us.

Don't confuse our crash with His grace. The notion that we must get to the end of ourselves before we crawl to him is a falsehood! Spending time in our bibles, praying, resting, having fellowship... Those are our daily flow stations. The enemy tries to make us believe that we should wear ourselves out and then make God a fill up station. The enemy tells us to run from brokenness. However, God tells us to have a broken and contrite spirit. We are NOT to be broken with weariness but to be broken in love. We should never be empty because God offers to flow his strength and love through us daily. Truth be told, he knows we are just sheep who need a Shepherd and every time we get lost he leaves the rest to come get us. Forgiving us over and over again. So let us try to stay near the Shepherd and not fear being broken in his presence. We drive ourselves like a relentless, cruel task master whereas Christ leads us with tenderness. Follow the Savior not the world. Be not afraid of complete vulnerability as you surrender your way to his. The world tells you its all about your power whereas, God empowers us with the same Spirit that rose Christ from the dead! I've done it both ways and trust me, his way is better.

Isaiah 41:18, "I will make rivers flow on barren heights, and springs within the valleys. I will turn the desert into pools of water, and the parched ground into springs."

Isaiah 43:19, "For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland."

Deuteronomy 31:8, "The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged."

Zechariah 4:6, "So he said to me, "This is the word of the LORD to Zerubbabel: 'Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit,' says the LORD Almighty."

Running ahead of God in our own strength is not wise. Be still and ask Him to go before you.